The Return of the Dance

He is back. A day early, without a phonecall. Caballito (Mr. Unavailble) texted me the news. He said he would explain later. I await “later.” I cannot lie. I am trying to ignore the emotions. History tells me that “later” will calm them, that there will be an explanation that satisfactorily contests my sentiments that he mustn’t care.

Yet, as I wait, I am upset. Anxious. Anticipating. And hurt. Trying to ignore any feelings until their appropriate time. A time when he didn’t have to rush back to this country to solve issues. A time where it’s just us. A time where we are actually speaking.

I search for an “off” button. A “ctrl-w” for this window of thought that can’t be worked on now. Perhaps, a “ctrl-q” would be better. Quit-without having to return to these frustrations.

Our bodies. Will our bodies meet? WIll these thoughts leave me long enough so that I don’t sabotage their reacquaintance? Will it be the second act of a shy dance between lovers? Or even better, will it just be a dance?

Please, I ask myself, don’t become a saboteur, not today . . .

To be cont.


3 thoughts on “The Return of the Dance

  1. I’ve only read one or two of your posts so far, but I love your writing. It makes me feel like I’m in the room with you or I’m in a hotel inside your mind and I’m hearing the thought wander in and out as you wrestle with yourself and the people around you.

    I’m adding you to my reader. I’ll be back often.

  2. Pingback: Paltry Subterfuge « Attaining the unattainable

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