The air is not as thick. The noises more frenetic. My eyes are fixed on red bricks and white paned windows sprouting out of Bleecker Street. The cars and people passing are out of eyes view and I think of my life, this box that I now inhabit once again versus the expanse I roamed.… [Read more…]
October 29, 2009
Passion, I lacked. Passion, I have now found. A new company. Almost ready to cut the threads to the other. The job I have juggled and responsibilities that were often fruitless while hours of work for mine awaited me. My company has gone from 0 mph to 60. And I sit, in awe at all.… [Read more…]
September 5, 2009
Spontaneity and simplicity is incredibly sexy. Wednesday. A perfectly mixed cocktail of excitement, nerves and fear pulsed through my body–a body whose shape has never been better. Perfect, some say. A body that has yet to become acquainted with ‘A’, but whose mind is intrigued. I have never met a man like A. 33. Incredibly… [Read more…]
December 11, 2008
I took a personal call this morning, a rare occasion during “work” hours. My girlfriend needed to speak and I called her on my way to the office, thinking five minutes would suffice. Five minutes became sixty. She shared intimate details, and a gift was given to me–she allowed me to open up to her.… [Read more…]
December 8, 2008
I am so torn. Rip me. Take a piece of me. I will leave it here for you. I am feeling hollow. Upset at my self-destructive nature. I crawl into myself. Less about me. More about others. I think. Self-destruction must be selfishness. But my life . . . A bubble engulfs me. There are… [Read more…]
November 21, 2008
In my life in PR, my expenses are paid for by work. In NY, they are not. (Of course, my NY bills are three times more than the ones here.) The company is headquartered in PR, but I work in both places. My moving here was because of the company. My life in NY existed… [Read more…]
November 10, 2008
Cont. from Parte 1. Sunday. I return home from El San Juan Hotel at 3am. For some reason, I wake up at 6:45am and decide to seize the day. I am walking my dog, as a car passes me, “heeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!” Two men are inside. I thought the driver was the gentlemen from dinner the night… [Read more…]
November 10, 2008
A random weekend. One chock full of straightforwardness. It reminds me of the time I smiled at drop-dead handsome man at the gym, amazed at my candor. I had returned from PR and I suppose the sun-kissed me, was also a more confident and secure me. Fast forward to him insisting on getting to know… [Read more…]
November 6, 2008
What an odd and unexpected evening. I left work and went to the gym. To my regular class. I critiqued my body. Felt fat, untoned. The comments by one of the trainers here ruled my thoughts. The gym once was a place that always restored my positive body image. Working out and seeing my reflection… [Read more…]
November 2, 2008
F$@! The blanket of depression that was merely hovering on Thursday completely engulfed me last night. Halloween . . . a costume bought- perhaps, not perfect, friends, fun, dancing, and champagne had no ability to attract me. My night was instead one of tears. Thinking of Samantha’s blowfish analogy, I had become the perfect representation.… [Read more…]
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April 3, 2010
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